“Be who you are
and say what you feel
because those who mind
don’t matter
and those who matter
don’t mind”.

The influence
that Dr. Seuss
had on me,

THIS quote’s meaning
didn’t sink in
until I was about
42.8 years old.

Being the middle child
in a typically conflicted family,
I was cast in the role
as mediator,
tension reliever,
the one responsible
for breaking
the ice that formed
around the
frozen tension
between everyone
than me and them.

I felt like a human icepick
with a big-ass,
shit eating grin.

I was fine.

I solved our family issues
by pointing out the truth
in a joking fashion,
and everyone THOUGHT
I was just joking,
but then
HAD to laugh
because no one could believe
that I was damn fool enough
to say
which we all knew
was true.

My Mom,
and her whichever husband,
at whatever time in her life,
would always
need someone else
to be there
to talk sense
into whichever one
gave me
the most threatening looks.

My Mom usually won
because I couldn’t bear
to lose THAT
love connection.

She always said
that she was a
master communicator,
and her razor sharp eyes
slashing at me
in THAT deadly fashion,
told me more
than her mouth
ever could.

Her eyes stopped me in my tracks.

I learned a lot
from being put
in the position
of being the mediator,
but I wouldn’t recommend it
if I were teaching
effective parenting.

It took me
THOSE 42.8 years
to realize
that I had
my own feelings,
my own thoughts,
my own desires,
and that in order for me
to evolve,
I had to muster the courage
to exit myself
from the role
that I was cast.

I still struggle
with NOT falling
into THAT pattern
of putting the
dysfunctional needs of others
before my own
and healthy dreams
and desires.

I love My Mother.
Today we giggle like schoolgirls
about how far we’ve come.

She did then
what she knew
how to do
with the tools
that she had.

All I can do now
is do what I know how to do
with the tools
that I have.

It’s all about love.

I cringe
at the stories
my daughter
will HAVE to write
when she’s my age.

*Ya’ll come get you
some Sister Louisa Art
in #106,
Sister Louisa’s Art Gallery
in The Church of The Living Room,
in The Telephone Factory Lofts.

828 Ralph McGill Blvd.,
Atlanta, Georgia 30306

Please park on Ralph McGill.

Photo by the incredibly talented Kendrick Brinson