Do we live
with fucking blinders on,
or WHAT?
Is Fear so seductive
and powerful
that it keeps us
just setting our clocks,
getting up,
showering,
and doing the same
boring-ass thing
over
and
over
and
over
again?
Ten,
twenty,
thirty years go by,
in a job,
relationship,
city,
or country,
and before you know it,
life is damn over!
We usually
don’t EVEN have the courage
to stop doing something
that doesn’t ring our bell,
doesn’t turn us on,
something that just
pays the fucking bills.
I’m like a hundred,
and I’ve got
more un-realized dreams
that I’ve had
German Chocolate Birthday Cakes!
Before my Sweet Grandmother died,
that Hunchback Sack of Flour
sent me a German Chocolate Cake,
wrapped in wax-damn-paper
in the US Mail
every year
on July First.
THAT was her dream
that she chose to realize.
She made a memory for me,
and THAT loving persistency,
regularity,
and follow-through-ed-ness,
is what she decided to do,
and is what she DID.
She did THAT for me
and for ALL of her other
sugar-addicted,
barrel-chested
Grandchildren,
spawned from
ALL of her eight
sugar-addicted,
barrel-chested
Children.
THAT
became her life work.
For the most part,
when we do something,
or when life changes for us,
it is because some
external force
has pushed us out
of our complacency and status quo.
Very rarely
does anyone
intentionally decide
to realize a dream,
or to re-create their life.
Have you ever been
in a situation
where you have
hemmed and hawed
(i love THOSE words)
over a brilliant idea,
yet the hemming and hawing of time
has killed
the magic and urgency
of the idea that you had
in the first place?
You start justifying
your laziness to yourself
by saying:
“that would have been amazing,
but I really couldn’t do THAT”,
or by listing every
lame-ass reason
why it would be
impossible.
Well just for
to-goddamn-day,
I’m going to do
what I say I’m going to do,
and I’m going to do it
until I go hunchback
like my dear old
Mammaw.
Can I get an Amen
up in The Church!
This much I know is true.